Over The Edge: December 2011

Dubai and India.

After leaving the lions and the giraffes behind in Africa we took a quick interlude in Dubai before heading off to India. Upon arriving in Dubai in the wee hours in the morning we marvelled at the cleanliness and sheer length of the airport. After crossing what seemed like miles of moving sidewalks we made it to a grumpy customs agent with what seemed to be a drawn on, intentional unibrow…. Yeah I have no answers either. So still blinking in the morning sun we embark upon what may be the cleanest journey so far. Yes Dubai is spotless. Everywhere. The subway system is spotless. The people seem to adhere to the rules about not eating drinking smoking and emptying the garbage out of their pockets on the train. The transit system was spotless… spotless. I have never seen a train this clean. After leaving the palace like train system we set off on a journey across the city to find The Mall. After a brief jaunt through the cleanest market I have ever seen we arrived at a mall filled with expensive stores and exciting adventures. One of these adventures was an aquarium so badass it contained sharks. The second of the wonders was the absolutely massive candy store. Following this was the less impressive waterfall sculpture and celling full of fake butterfly’s. then there was the dancing fountain. Somebody spent a lot of time and money making this thing extra cool. The full glory of this thing at night was something I never got to see but you could imagine it from what it looked like in the day time.

After the OCD like cleanliness of Dubai India came as quite a shock. The first thing we noticed upon leaving the airport was the air. It was thick and foggy and hard to breath. The second thing that we noticed was that the road lines and rules seemed to be a suggestion at best. There was lines painted on the road indicating 3 lanes of traffic however there was about 5 lanes of traffic driving on the road. Once you stop being terrified and open your eyes again you may notice something odd about the trucks. They do not really look like trucks back home. These trucks are painted. Some are painted very well, often they have streamers and garlands and bits of fabric. All in all it makes a very pretty terror monster barrelling towards you honking its horn on the wrong side of the road. Note: The horns on vehicles are used so much that may people have special honkers installed that will play you a song. A very loud not overly interesting song… the first destination after Delhi was Agra. The city of Agra bosts the agra fort an impressive bit of architecture. More impressive and fancy then you would expect from something called a fort but as we quickly discovered, In India they will decorate anything. Overshadowing the fort is the Taj Mahal. The romantic symbol of beauty and devotion from an emperor to his favorite wife. Given the reputation and the reviews one would expect the lawns to be cut. You would be mistaken. The overall impression of the site was disappointing. The structures were magnificent and detailed and beautiful but the lawns and gardens were overgrown and the fountains were skankey. This combined with the fog really detracted from the splendour of the buildings. After our Agra adventure and some more tea. Seriously there was so much tea. We went onwards to Rajasthan to try and see some tigers. One may thing when they hear the term “tiger safari” that there would actually be a chance of seeing a tiger. Once again you would be mistaken. While there is technically a chance of seeing a tiger the situation is as follows. You get into a huge loud vehicle and drive up a road. Then you stop at a bathroom turn around and go back down the same road. While there may be tigers along the way for the most part if I was a tiger I would stay away from the road. The main highlight of the “safari ” was the bits of old buildings and shrines tucked away in the forest. As well you could see this big fort on the top of a cliff in the distance.

After leaving the forest we ventured to Japur. This was an interesting city with a lot of big dirty markets. They were neat to wander through and we got henned up on our hands and feet making it an interesting walk while everything dried. We did some walking around and some shopping then headed out to look at a variety of forts. India seems to just have an abundance of forts. Europe has more churches then it knows what to do with and India has to many forts. They are all beautiful examples of overly fancy architecture and look quite impressive. However once you have seen 5 or 6 forts you just don’t need to see another 20 more. So we didn’t. Opting instead to take pictures in front of the floating castle and eat ice cream.

Some interesting notes on india. The people here make the best tea ever. I don’t know exactly how they do it but I have come home with a few rescipies and a box of stuff so I can try it. The tea is everywhere and it is all good. We more or less drank nothing but tea the whole time we were in India.

In India they paint, decorate and generally fancy up everything. The houses, the trucks. The camels, the elephants and the people are all covered in as many bits of fancy sparkly things that will fit. The buildings have intricate stonework , the people have some rather impressive clothing choices and the animals are painted or shaved to make them prettier.

India Is dirty. No seriously. Dirty. Maybe the rural aireas are nicer and I am willing to investigate this possibility but the cities are just nasty. There is garbage everywhere. Everywhere. And people just don’t seem to care at all. I don’t know how they don’t notice it. This was by far the dirtiest place we have been.

Overall india was interesting and had a lot of forts. But I didn’t love it. Really I tried to love it I wanted to love it but I just couldn’t. I am not ready to write it off completely and would probably adventure into the more remote aireas of the country. It is a big place and we only gave it a week. But I expect more effort next time. Way to put in a half hearted effort India I expect you to try harder next time.